12-step recovery programs Archives

75 Biblical Ways to Resist Sexual Temptation

by Alan Sharpe October 13, 2022

If you want to resist unwanted sexual urges and overcome sexual temptation, here are 75 ways from the Bible (including the Bible) to overcome sexual temptation.

by Alan Sharpe October 13, 2022

If you are a Christian and if you are even remotely healthy, you face sexual temptation on occasion. If you want to resist these urges so that you do not fall into sin, here are some biblical ways to overcome sexual temptation (including the Bible).

1. Count the Cost
Sexual sin comes at a price, in this life and in the next. For one thing, adulterers and the sexually immoral will not inherit the kingdom (Galatians 5:19-21). That’s the eternal cost—your soul, punished forever, in the lake of fire. But there’s also a price to pay in this life if you give in to sexual temptation. Think sexually transmitted diseases. Unwanted pregnancy. Divorce. Loss of custody of your kids. Getting fired. Scandal. Loss of your testimony. Jail time. Your name on the Sexual Offender Registry.

2. Clea

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Consequences
Quit Porn in Three Words | John 5:14

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by Alan Sharpe August 17, 2022

Jesus doesn’t expect you to continue looking at porn any more than He expected the healed man from the Pool of Bethesda to continue in his sin.

by Alan Sharpe August 17, 2022

Afterward Jesus found him in the temple, and said to him, “See, you have been made well. Sin no more, lest a worse thing come upon you.”
John 5:14

One of the reasons I left Celebrate Recovery is that I never faced consequences for my sexual sin. Brothers like me, caught up in the sin of habitual porn use, would attend the meetings week after week, being pure one week, falling into sin the next, but nothing ever happened. Actually, something happened. We received a “First Time Attender” blue chip each time we reset our sobriety clock to one day of sobriety. This was not the biblical model for dealing with a brother who was living in sexual sin, so I left.

What I never heard at Celebrate Recovery meetings were those simple words of Jesus: “Sin no more.” Jesus said them to the woman caught in adultery (John 8:11), and he said them to the ma
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Prevention
Want to Quit Porn and Masturbation? Say “No.” | Titus 2:11-12

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by Alan Sharpe April 8, 2022

The biblical remedy for porn, masturbation and sexual immorality isn’t complicated. It can be summed up in one word.

by Alan Sharpe April 8, 2022

“For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age.”
Titus 2:11-12 NIV

Want to know the secret to quitting porn? Quit porn. Want to know the secret to not masturbating? Don’t masturbate. I realize that this sounds like simplistic advice, because it is. The guaranteed way to quit sexual immorality is to quit sexual immorality. That’s what the Bible says.

How do you quit porn? Say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions. How do you quit masturbation? Say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions. That’s the formula, that’s the proven method, that’s the biblical remedy. It’s not complicated.

Celebrate Recovery, Sexaholics Anonymous and other 12-step programs complicate this issue of forsaking sexual sin. <a href="https://www.celebraterecovery.co
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Accountability
Don’t Call Your Sexual Sin a Shortcoming | Isaiah 5:20

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by Alan Sharpe March 31, 2022

The longer you remain in the world of euphemism and abstraction, the longer you remain in your sin. Biblical victory over sin requires a biblical vocabulary.

by Alan Sharpe March 31, 2022

“Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; Who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; Who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!“
Isaiah 5:20

I began getting victory over the sexual sin in my life when I started calling it what it is. When I stopped using the vocabulary of sexual addiction, when I abandoned the euphemisms of 12-step recovery programs, I gained clarity. I saw my sin the way God sees it. I understood the penalty that awaits me if I don’t repent. And I finally understood the biblical steps I had to take to attain, and maintain, sexual purity—and why.

The closer you draw to God’s Word, the closer you get to understanding His revealed will. Once you start describing your sin the way God describes it, you start thinking in biblical terms about your sanctification. Coming to terms with your sexual immorality requires you to come to terms with what God says on the subject. The longer you remain in the world of euphemi
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Accountability
Call It Porn Addiction Only if You Forsake It | Proverbs 28:13

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by Alan Sharpe March 18, 2022

If you call your habitual use of pornography an addiction, you must have your reasons. But are they good reasons? Take this quiz and find out.

by Alan Sharpe March 18, 2022

“He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy.”
Proverbs 28:13

Last time I checked, “porn addiction” still wasn’t recognized in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, the book doctors use to diagnose mental disorders. Which means, if you are a Christian man who calls your habitual use of pornography an addiction, you must have your reasons. But are they good reasons? Are you justified in calling your activity an addiction, and yourself an addict? Take this little quiz and find out.

Christian Man A: I call it porn addiction for the wrong reasons

(Circle all that apply)

I want to avoid responsibility for my actions. When I call my sin an addiction, this takes the blame off me and puts it somewhere else.
I want to cast myself i
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Obedience
You Aren’t a Porn Addict Who Needs Recovery | 1 Corinthians 15:34

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by Alan Sharpe March 11, 2022

Watching pornography isn’t an addiction you recover from. Masturbation isn’t a compulsive habit you need treatment for. Both are wicked sins that you are to stop doing. Now. Not eventually.

by Alan Sharpe March 11, 2022

“Awake to righteousness, and do not sin; for some do not have the knowledge of God. I speak this to your shame.”
1 Corinthians 15:34

If you discover that a brother in your congregation has a habit of sneaking out of the house at night and murdering people, should you encourage him to get into a 12-step recovery program so that he can overcome his childhood trauma and gradually wean himself off his bad habit?

What about theft? If you learn that a brother in the Lord has a compulsion to pick pockets on the metro, should you encourage him to attend Celebrate Recovery meetings month after month until he finally gains victory over his addiction?

What about lying? If your Christian colleague repeatedly lies to his boss, lies to you and lies to your bank, should you invite him to join Christian Liars Anonymous and to take their 90-Day Truth Detox as many times as needed until he eventually sto
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Lust
Are You a Slave Without a Master? | Titus 3:3

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by Alan Sharpe March 3, 2022

No one bought you in a slave market. No one owns you. No one commands you to sin sexually.

by Alan Sharpe March 3, 2022

“For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful and hating one another.”
Titus 3:3

Do you consider yourself powerless over pornography? Do you look at your masturbation habit and consider it a compulsive behavior that you are unable to manage? Do you, in short, believe that you are a slave to sexual immorality? If you believe these things about yourself, then you believe the first lie of the Celebrate Recovery 12 Steps: “We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.”

Celebrate Recovery bills itself as a “Christ-centered, 12 step recovery program for anyone struggling with hurt, pain or addiction of any kind.” The movement is filled with sincere Christian leaders who mean
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Judgment
Why You Can’t Pray and Masturbate at the Same Time | Romans 1:28-29

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by Alan Sharpe February 4, 2022

Habitual masturbation to porn is one symptom of a heart hardened towards God, of a mind that no longer likes to retain a knowledge of God.

by Alan Sharpe February 4, 2022

“And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting; being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers.” Romans 1:28-29

When God gives up on an individual, He gives them over to sexual immorality. Habitual sexual sin is one symptom of a heart hardened towards God, of a mind that no longer likes to retain a knowledge of God. The wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness (Romans 1:18).

If you are a Christian man who habitually masturbates to pornography, and if you desire to quit, reverse-engineer this text to uncover the cause of your bondage—and the remedy. Don’t look to your childhood. Don’t listen to Celebrate Recovery and
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Consequences
Are You a Porn Victim? Or a Volunteer? | Ephesians 4:17-19

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by Alan Sharpe January 25, 2022

Sin is always voluntary, never compulsory. No one, and no thing, forces you to look at pornography. You are never a victim. Only a volunteer.

by Alan Sharpe January 25, 2022

“This I say, therefore, and testify in the Lord, that you should no longer walk as the rest of the Gentiles walk, in the futility of their mind, having their understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God, because of the ignorance that is in them, because of the blindness of their heart; who, being past feeling, have given themselves over to lewdness, to work all uncleanness with greediness.”
Ephesians 4:17-19 NKJV

In the battle against pornography and sexual immorality, there is no such thing as defeat—only surrender. There is never a time when temptation defeats you, or when sin defeats you, or when the devil defeats you. When you fall to porn or sexual sin, it’s not because you are overpowered. It’s because you surrender.

Sin is always voluntary, never compulsory. No one, and no thing, forces you to look at pornography. No one, and no thing, compels you to masturbate. Yes, the desire may seem irresistible, the urge may appear i
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Sanctification
Sexual Purity Is a Journey, Not a Destination | Romans 13:13

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by Alan Sharpe January 20, 2022

You don’t have a destination. You only have your daily walk with the Lord. And that walk involves no sexual immorality today.

by Alan Sharpe January 20, 2022

“Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy.” Romans 13:13 ESV

If you want to get victory over habitual sexual sin, such as pornography and masturbation, first realize that you won’t find sexual purity on any map. Sexual purity isn’t a destination you hope to reach tomorrow. It’s a walk you take today.

In Paul’s words, you must “walk properly as in the daytime.” That is, you are to walk honestly (KJV), behave decently (NIV), conduct yourself properly and honorably (Amplified). Your walk is to involve no orgies or drunkenness, no sexual immorality or sensuality, and no quarreling or jealousy. Your walk is to be different from those who live in darkness.

Just don’t expect to arrive at a place in your life where you experience zero sexual lust, zero sexual temptation or zero sexual fantasies. T
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Accountability
Christian Porn Addict is an Oxymoron

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by Alan Sharpe January 11, 2022

The longer you view yourself as a porn addict who needs treatment and recovery, the longer you will take to gain lasting victory over your sexual immorality.

by Alan Sharpe January 11, 2022

If you are a Christian man who uses pornography habitually or compulsively, you are a sinner, a voluntary slave to sin—but not a porn addict. The longer you view yourself as a victim, and the longer you think of yourself as an addict who needs treatment, recovery and hand-holding, the longer you will take to repent of your sin and conquer pornography.

“Christian porn addict” is an oxymoron. The phrase ranks right up there with exact estimate, working vacation, same difference, civil war, genuine imitation, unbiased opinion and government savings plan. If you watch, read or listen to pornography habitually, God calls you an adulterer, a fornicator, void of understanding, deceived, and wicked—but never an addict.

Here are the top reasons you should stop calling yourself a Christian porn addict.

1. Porn addiction doesn’t exist

According to The American Psychological Association (APA), “Addiction
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Temptation
Your Porn Problem is Internal | James 1:14

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by Alan Sharpe December 2, 2021

You respond to pornography because you desire it. You can’t be tempted by something you don’t desire. If you want to gain victory over your temptations, replace your desires.

by Alan Sharpe December 2, 2021

Your compulsive use of pornography is a heart issue. Sure, you live in a hyper-sexualized culture. And sure, pornography is attractive because it’s available, affordable and anonymous, and because it gives you a dopamine hit on queue. But your porn problem isn’t outside of you. You can’t blame anyone when you fall to temptation.

Likewise with the multiple remedies on the market for helping “porn addicts.” Therapy, sexual addiction clinics, 12-step recovery groups, internet porn filters, rubber bands on your wrist, accountability partners and more all have their place. These are external aids that may help you gain victory over your compulsive sexual sin. But you can’t blame anyone, or any group, or any technology, when you give in to temptation and watch pornography.

You know this, and I know this, because God’s Word is clear on the matter. You are drawn to watch pornography by an inward compulsion. That compulsion is lust. Read all about it in the New Testament book of James:
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Obedience
You Are Not a Porn Addict. You’re a Volunteer. | Romans 6:13

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by Alan Sharpe November 18, 2021

You are not addicted to porn or masturbation. You offer yourself willingly to these things. Victory comes through obedience to Scripture and faith in Christ, not through therapy or a 12-step recovery program.

by Alan Sharpe November 18, 2021

If you are guilty of habitual sexual sin, you may call yourself an addict. You consider yourself powerless over your sex addiction, as a drug addict is powerless over heroin and an alcoholic is powerless over Jack Daniels. Pornography is your “drug of choice.” You require therapy and a 12-step recovery program. Quitting pornography means “going clean,” or “getting sober.” Looking at pornography and masturbating isn’t sin. It’s just a relapse.

But when you read the New Testament, you never find sexual sin described as a narcotic, or lusting after women called an addiction. Instead, the writers of the New Testament describe sexual immorality as voluntary, something you do with your free will. Something you can conquer through obedience and faith. Consider the letter to the Romans, chapter six, in which Paul writes:

“Do not go on presenting the parts of your body to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but present yourselves to God as those who are alive

“Do not go on presenting the parts of your body to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but present yourselves to God as those who are alive
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